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What The Bible Says Good Samaritan's Penny Pulpit by Pastor Ed Rice

What The Bible Says Good Samaritan's Penny Pulpit by Pastor Ed Rice

What The Bible Says Good Samaritan's Penny Pulpit by Pastor Ed Rice

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Please let us know if you are joining us! If this is your first time watching our service online, or if you have made a decision ...

Please let us know if you are joining us! If this is your first time watching our service online, or if you have made a decision ...

Please let us know if you are joining us! If this is your first time watching our service online, or if you have made a decision ...

Today's category: DrunksGive Me A Push? ? ? ? ? ? A man is in bed with his wife when there is a rat-a-tat-tat on the door. He rolls over and looks at his clock, and it's half past three in the morning. "I'm not getting out of bed at this time," he thinks, and rolls over.? ? ? ? ? ? Then, a louder knock follows. "Aren't you going to answer that?" says his wife.? ? ? ? ? ? So he drags himself out of bed and goes downstairs. He opens the door and there is man standing at the door. It didn't take the homeowner long to realize the man was drunk.? ? ? ? ? ? "Hi there," slurs the stranger. "Can you give me a push?"? ? ? ? ? ? "No, get lost. It's half past three. I was in bed," says the man and he slams the door. He goes back up to bed and tells his wife what happened.? ? ? ? ? ? "Dave, that wasn't very nice of you," she says.? ? ? ? ? ? "Remember that night we broke down in the pouring rain on the way to pick the kids up from the babysitter, and you had to knock on that man's house to get us started again? What would have happened if he'd told us to get lost?"? ? ? ? ? ? "But the guy was drunk," says the husband.? ? ? ? ? ? "It doesn't matter," says the wife. "He needs our help and it would be the Christian thing to help him." So the husband gets out of bed again, gets dressed, and goes downstairs. He opens the door, and not being able to see the stranger anywhere, he shouts, "Hey, do you still want a push?" And he hears a voice cry out, "Yeah, please." So, still being unable to see the stranger, he shouts,? ? ? ? ? ? "Where are you?"? ? ? ? ? ? "I'm over here," the stranger replies, "on your swing."View hundreds more jokes online.Email this joke to a friend

Today's category: CrimeFrom the Mouth of Babes? ? ? ? ? ? Little Johnny's kindergarden class was on a field trip to their local police station where they saw pictures, tacked to a bulletin board, of the 10 most wanted men. ? ? ? ? ? ? One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it really was the photo of a wanted person. ? ? ? ? ? ? "Yes," said the policeman. "The detectives want him very badly." ? ? ? ? ? ? Little Johnny asked, "So, why didn't you keep him when you took his picture?"View hundreds more jokes online.Email this joke to a friend

By John C. A. Manley Last summer, the modem supplied by my internet service provider broke down. So I ran it to the shop on...3 reasons I refuse to use WiFry (despite making a living working online)

Today's category: CreationWhy God Created Animals? ? ? ? ? ? A newly discovered chapter in the Book of Genesis has provided the answer to "Where do pets come from?" Adam said, "Lord, when I was in the garden, you walked with me everyday. Now I do not see you anymore. I am lonesome here and it is difficult for me to remember how much you love me."? ? ? ? ? ? And God said, "No problem! I will create a companion for you that will be with you forever and who will be a reflection of my love for you, so that you will love me even when you cannot see me. Regardless of how selfish or childish or unlovable you may be, this new companion will accept you as you are and will love you as I do, in spite of yourself."? ? ? ? ? ? And God created a new animal to be a companion for Adam. And it was a good animal. And God was pleased. And the new animal was pleased to be with Adam and he wagged his tail. And Adam said, "Lord, I have already named all the animals in the Kingdom and I cannot think of a name for this new animal."? ? ? ? ? ? And God said, "No problem! Because I have created this new animal to be a reflection of my love for you, his name will be a reflection of my own name, and you will call him DOG."? ? ? ? ? ? And Dog lived with Adam and was a companion to him and loved him. And Adam was comforted. And God was pleased. And Dog was content and wagged his tail.? ? ? ? ? ? After a while, it came to pass that Adam's guardian angel came to the Lord and said, "Lord, Adam has become filled with pride. He struts and preens like a peacock and he believes he is worthy of adoration. Dog has indeed taught him that he is loved, but perhaps too well."? ? ? ? ? ? And the Lord said, "No problem! I will create for him a companion who will be with him forever and who will see him as he is. The companion will remind him of his limitations, so he will know that he is not always worthy of adoration."? ? ? ? ? ? And God created CAT to be a companion to Adam. And Cat would not obey Adam. And when Adam gazed into Cat's eyes, he was reminded that he was not the supreme being. And Adam learned humility.? ? ? ? ? ? And God was pleased.? ? ? ? ? ? And Adam was greatly improved.? ? ? ? ? ? And Dog was happy.? ? ? ? ? ? And the Cat didn't give a hoot one way or the other.View hundreds more jokes online.Email this joke to a friend